TRUSTING YOURself
Drowning in the modern self-help world
and the myriads of conflicting advice
We have all become confused.
Positive Psychology says you ought to think on the bright side,
Eastern philosophies say you should not try too hard.
The motivational speaker says you do too little,
Mindfulness says you do too much.
The nutritionist says something is wrong if you have pain,
But the Buddha says suffering is an essential part of life.
When your inner critic tries hard enough,
he can turn anything into a self- defeat,
as if you could do nothing right.
You keep fixing this and that, and yet
your moods are still unpredictable
and things remain groundless.
We have all bought into this great myth that says
We can fix ourselves,
or that we have so much control over how we feel.
The truth is,
It is not up to our wilful efforts.
Everything is a part of nature.
Not just the trees, the animals,
but also every human- your friends, your foes, that stranger, that challenging family member.
Everything is a part of nature.
The situations, the good and the bad, the yin and the yang.
Everything is a part of nature.
You, and everything that comes through you:
Your thoughts, feelings, preferences, judgments, pleasant and unpleasant sensations.
And like everything else in nature,
There is no mistake.
There is wisdom in our spontaneous, organismic reactions to the circumstances in life.
Your feelings
— no matter what shape or form—
are your instantaneous and visceral dance with life,
are wholly organic and,
are in harmony with the natural order.
Your anger needs to be there; your fears need to be there.
Your addiction is a noble effort to survive the unthinkable trauma.
Your compulsion is a vigorous attempt to find order in a world of chaos.
The argument with your partner is
a result of two people’s clumsy attempt to love,
and a touching manifestation of your dedication to each other.
You cannot ‘fail’ to meditate, to be sane, or to be wise.
Your seemingly unwholesome actions, negative feelings, undesirable urges
are all parts of it.
In nature,
there is a time for everything.
A time for grace, a time for sorrow.
A time to sow, a time to harvest.
Nature does not hurry, gets anxious, or beat herself up,
And yet everything gets done in just the right time.
You are a part of nature’ s creation
And therefore, just like everything else,
the trees, the changing weather, the life cycles of all beings
You are being taken care of.
Your bodily function is an ever-lasting prove of this truth.
You ‘do’ nothing, and yet nothing is left undone-
You do not ‘breath your breaths
Or ‘beat your heart’
Or contract and dilate your blood vessels.
They all take care of themselves.
In fact, whenever you try to ‘do something’ with them,
you obstruct their natural rhythm.
So the next time you feel out of control
See if you can
Drop the idea that there is a right and a wrong;
Erase the image that there is someone in the clouds
wagging his finger at you;
Disregard the sense that something is haunting you, pushing you to do more, be better, run faster.
Like everything else, YOU are a part of nature.
It runs harmoniously in you- through your blood, your breaths, your feelings and your actions.
In nature, nothing can truly be ‘out of alignment.’
And in this sense, you can do no wrong.
We have got you.
This week, see if you can tap into your intuitive and instinctive nature, rather than having to be rational, in control and logical all the time.
Try being spontaneous and unguarded.
Trusting in our nature does not mean we blindly believe we will be safe from all danger and disappointment, but we consciously decide to trust the process.
Simply allow the answer to come to you.
The system of intuition is very efficient, so it does not overload you with information you do not need ahead of time.
If you do not have answers yet, do not force it.
Trust that the answer will come when the time is ripe.
Just like when its time winter turns into spring, the spout will emerge.
It is inevitable.
“You trust you’ll know what you need to know just when you need to know it.”— Penney Peirce
TODAY’S EXPERIMENT: BEING SPONTANEOUS
For just one day, practise trusting your instinct.
Practise the skill of being spontaneous in responding to whatever comes as it comes, without always pre-planning.
Do not plan anything ahead of time; do not decide on anything before you need to.
For example,
Do not decide ahead of time what you want for dinner, go into a supermarket, and see what food calls out for your attention. Then, slowly approach it, hold it in your hand, and feel into its vibration- what does your body say? Is it leaning towards, or backward? Listen to your still small voice within.
Or maybe, do not decide which way to take on your way to work, and let your body decides when you come to the junction.
For one day, abandon all the need to analyse- just let your body take you.
If your usual urges to control, plan, etc come back, gently remind yourself that there is no harm in experimenting with a new way of being- even just for this one time.
Allowing yourself to be immersed in the totality of your current reality is one of the biggest gifts for your soul.
By doing so, you enter an ecstatic ‘flow’ state; just like in extreme sports, surfing, or intense meditation.
Taking one step through life at a time, giving each step your complete attention
You will soon find a wondrous new vitality and creativity to your life.
Mindfulness and staying present is a muscle that can be trained.
Habits die hard, but with practice, self-trust and spontaneity will become your new natural.
Towards the end of the day, write or scribble in your visual journal the outcome of this experiment.